Treacle Gothic

I did know a lot of things could happen when I said yes, I knew in the back of my mind one of those things might be embarrassment.

I felt excited at first and then felt some foreboding. What exactly can go wrong when you agree to volunteer to run the cotton candy machine at the school fair. Cavities and toothaches? A fire? Can you cause an explosion?

Depending on the direction of the wind you may suddenly realize that you are covered with a thickening layer of pink sugar insulation. Yep, that 's what happened, but not only that, I realized after about 15 tries at winding the sugar strands around the paper cone spool that you have to go clockwise, and even then my bundles of sugar were lopsided with weird dreadlocks of sugar hanging off some of them.

I know it couldn't have been so hard, I've been watching people effortlessly bundle the sugar into beautiful puffy clouds my entire life. But when I try the cone slips out of my sweaty gloved hand, gets slapped by strings that beat the sugar into strands.

Although the man I am paired with in this enterprise at one point comments that he feels like he's watching an episode of I Love Lucy, the insanity of it all breaks us both down and soon we are talking about the stunning pattern of light and shadow on the cloud that temporarily gives us relief from the heat that is baking the fall festival this afternoon. I start demanding that children name their cotton candy before they eat it. Names they choose: pinky, poodle.

One thing to look forward to for next time, the cotton candy makes a surprisingly good hair product, gives hold and a slight pink shininess, although the little pink globs are kind of disgusting, but still the kids pick them out of your hair and eat them, creating a questionable sense of primate primacy. And the webbiness of the pink strands decorating my right arm might again make an entirely seasonal addition to my new favorite fall fashions.

I was a little disappointed when I got home and could look at myself in the mirror. I wasn't half as pink and fluffy as I thought I was.