I was in the Whole Foods at Union Square yesterday and was sidetracked from my mission by these Ostrich eggs that sell for 40 each. They left me feeling a little short of breath, envying those creatures with hingeless jaws, and filled with questions for which I had no answer.
The first question was would I ever buy one, and if so, why, and what would I make from it? What is an unconventional Ostrich egg? Is it square? Also in question, if I sat on the egg, would it break? Would I break? Has one ever been used as a murder weapon or been responsible for an accidental death? Another question, why did the Whole Foods smell like a Mcdonald's that day, was there other supersizing in evidence? Will the Brooklyn Whole Foods ever open? Does anyone care anymore?
Today's big question is why were Brooklyn and Queens selected for special honors? Is there a Manhattan day that I don't know about? What about a Bronx-Staten Island day? Would they consent to be paired? Is celebrating the Borough of Kings and Queens together really a royalist throwback?
Ok, no more questions, just some gratuitous poppies. Have an excellent BQ day.
5 comments:
I am addicted to your poppies.
I'm finding the poppies make good psychoanalysts.
Texans call the birds who lay these eggs Ass Stretchers...
Sorry.
I had one, once, in Cape Town. My friend Mr Christie prepared it thus:
Boiled till done: forty-five minutes.
Shell removed. Egg placed on large oval dish. Cut at table with electric carving knife. Brown butter poured over. Chopped parsely sprinkled over. Pepper. Served one slice each, with more buttered, brown bread. The sort of delicious, seedy, moist brown bread I have never seen in another country.
$40??????
Have you seen the green emu eggs?
Ass stretchers! My son would love that. He'd probably laugh so much he'd throw up. Well, he is 7.
Never seen the Emu eggs. Are they bigger?
No, smaller, but more prehistoric, and a deep jade colour.
Since I am very bad at telling jokes, I would be flattered if your son threw up at this one.
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